Companies: Not Helicopter Parents

Many organizations tend to replicate the roles of children, adults and parents. In the workplace, some of those same characteristics can manifest among managers and their team members. Just as a helicopter approach at home can impact a child’s health and independence, raise anxiety and suppress confidence, an overly paternalistic or autocratic style at the office can erode employees’ sense of personal responsibility.

My way or the highway

The classic “my way or the highway” management style was developed in the 19th century, conceived to maximize productivity and efficiency. In that context, an autocratic leadership style evolved, whereby managers exerted tight control according to clearly defined processes, relying on little significant input from lower employees. They set boundaries and imposed discipline. At the same time, hierarchical structures diminished the need to consult large groups of people about decisions. Business structures were built on carrot-and-stick motivations; in other words, in a culture of fear — obey me or else.

In the following century, many organizations became “flatter” and employees became responsible for their own conduct and well-being. Business expanded from the old production lines, particularly in the emerging knowledge industries.

Employers began to realize that the old-fashioned command-and-control practices born in the Industrial Revolution were not designed to promote trust. Ideally, they would prefer to manage empowered staff whom they did not need to train or monitor so closely. Today’s employees have come to expect a more transparent and participatory culture. They now want to be treated as equals and active contributors rather than passive implementers. They do not like clocking in and out, as accountability suggests there should be less reason to cheat.

During and since the pandemic, management practices continued to evolve. The paradox remains that companies clearly desire mature and accountable staff, yet many executives still believe they are adept at delegating and inspiring teams based on principles they have inherited from the old, paternalistic style.

How ‘copter managers behave

Parents who overprotect and micromanage tend to give their children insufficient free, unsupervised time or not treat them as independent agents. Many who grow up and arrive at adult jobs find employers are still operating on a similar fantasy plane.

Kids who have been infantilized sometimes seek permission for every action. They fall victim to learned helplessness. As adults, they might be reluctant to take creative risks and may spend a lot of emotion worrying about job security.

Bosses who fall into ‘copter parenting mode may fear relinquishing the power of ownership or entrusting their position and reputation to someone else. Sometimes the behavior derives from poor modeling based on what they themselves have experienced in the workplace.

Those are the managers who demand obedience, micromanage, constantly remind and pester their teams about instructions, and are hesitant to delegate. Everybody has encountered the boss who insists on doing the work themself because they lack confidence that anyone else reliably can. Or perhaps they are quick to correct and admonish employees in front of the entire team.

It is ironic that each year companies are spending over $100 billion on employee engagement and well-being initiatives with a grand aim to nurture staff in every aspect. Notwithstanding, according to Gallup, engagement has reached an 11-year low.

Be a partner, not a parent

Both bosses and team members should try to hold each other accountable. You might ask, “How can we find a solution together?” Sharing that responsibility can help lighten a manager’s burden.

• Trust your staff’s judgment rather than rigid processes.
• Permit them to make mistakes as learning experiences.
• Assign broader challenges rather than specific tasks.
• Provide some structure for them to function successfully.
• Recognize they have outside lives, respect their privacy and show appreciation.
• Treat them as family and individuals.
• Indicate you have their backs and will protect them.

Your team members are your assets, not your liabilities. Make them worthwhile partners.

© YC Partners 2025